


Breakable

by theskywasblue



Category: Saiyuki
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-05-20
Updated: 2010-05-20
Packaged: 2017-10-09 14:29:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/88452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theskywasblue/pseuds/theskywasblue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hakkai and Gojyo in the aftermath of Reload Vol. 7</p>
            </blockquote>





	Breakable

Hakkai's first waking sensation was of pain. Not overly intense pain – although he hadn't really felt a pain he would have considered intense since that night four years ago when he had stumbled from a bloody tower clutching his own entrails in his hands – still, it was a sustained pain, a pain that promised not to abate for some time to come, a pain that almost seemed to say 'you will feel this for the rest of your life.'

He almost laughed.

His next sensation was of a warm, rough palm brushing the hair back from his forehead, and a familiar voice whispering, "Hakkai?"

His eyes fluttered open.

The room was thick with shadow, lit only by an oil lamp; the ceiling was whitewashed stone, cracked, dripping moisture.

He had absolutely no idea where he was.

"Hakkai?"

He tipped his head on the thin pillow, licked his lips. His throat was painfully dry. All he could see was shadow. Someone pressed the rim of a glass against his lips, slid a hand under his head and eased him up.

"Drink okay?"

The water tasted stale and faintly metallic, but he swallowed it as quickly as he could manage, again and again until someone murmured "Hey, hey…easy," and drew the cup away, splashing stray droplets of water down his chin and across his chest. Hakkai tried to raise his hand, to take more water, but a spike of sudden pain kept his arm pinned to his side.

"Don't try and move around, just relax."

Hakkai lay back on the pillow. Careful hands drew a scratchy wool blanket higher up his chest. The light in the room increased by fractions, failing to chase back the shadows as the lamp was turned up.

Hakkai saw red.

"Gojyo?"

"Hey…" the half-demon smiled weakly. There were dark circles under his eyes, a layer of reddish stubble on his square jaw. When Hakkai turned his head he could see an ashtray on the small bedside table, piled high with still smouldering cigarette butts. It was evident his friend had been keeping vigil for quite some time.

And then, Hakkai remembered.

"Goku!" He tried to sit up, but Gojyo's hand on his shoulder kept him pinned to the mattress, "Where's Goku? How…"

"You should stop worrying about everyone else and worry about your damn self once and a while," Gojyo ground out, not releasing the pressure on Hakkai's shoulders until the other man had relaxed into the bed once again, "the kid's fine. His wounds are already healed. He's sleeping."

"How long has it been?"

"Little over a day."

Hakkai managed to lift a hand to rub at his gritty eyes, and then laid it down across his chest, "And Sanzo?"

Gojyo looked away.

"Ah…" Hakkai laughed weakly, making ripples of pain trickle up his spine and through his battered muscles, "We've made a fine mess of things, haven't we?"

"Probably."

Hakkai took several deep breaths, closed his eyes. He could have slipped easily back into sleep then, but he realized there was one person that he had yet to ask about.

"And you?"

"What about me?"

"Yes," Hakkai repeated, with a barely repressed smile, "What about you, Gojyo?"

There was a pause. Hakkai opened his eyes and looked up. Gojyo's face was turned away, looking into the night outside the room's small window. Hakkai could hear him breathing.

"Hell," Gojyo snorted finally, "I'm fine. Don't have a scratch on me. I wasn't the one taking on Seiten Taisei remember? All I got was a sore back carrying you idiots away from there before the villagers could regroup and chase us out with torches and pitchforks."

Gojyo tucked a stray strand of hair behind his ear, reached to the nightstand for his smokes, but stopped halfway.

"You look tired," Hakkai said gently, "have you been awake all this time?"

"Off and on," Gojyo folded his arms, laid his head down on the edge of the bed near Hakkai's hip. His hair hid nearly every aspect of his face in shadow, but fell in just such a way that Hakkai could make out the twin scars on his cheek.

"Gojyo," he asked softly, "are you really alright?"

Gojyo mumbled something unintelligible into the mattress.

"What was that?"

A pause, and then, barely a whisper, "You left me."

Hakkai's chest tightened with guilt. He couldn't even deny it, because he had seen it, just as he had on that night four years ago – an expanse of almost blinding whiteness, cherry blossom trees in bloom and a perfectly clear expanse of water filled with lilies – and then, just as on that night, he had heard a voice calling him back.

The same voice.

Heedless to his own pain, Hakkai reached down and laid his hand on the back of Gojyo's neck, twinning his fingers through the warm, unwashed tangles of Gojyo's crimson hair. Gojyo's shoulders were shaking. The air smelled of salt water.

"I'm sorry Gojyo," Hakkai murmured gently, caressing the downy hairs at the base of Gojyo's neck with his thumb, "I'll try not to let it happen again."

-End-


End file.
